A coach with a father’s heart pushes athletes to be their best, but never in a way that crushes their spirit. Instead, coaches inspire from a place of deep love and commitment.
I recently reposted some thoughts I wrote in 2021 while musing on an overseas road trip. I wanted to follow that post up with some more practical advice I’d like to share with my coaches at our gym, especially the coaches that work with kids in our Non-profit wing, Father’s Heart Sports.
To coach with a father’s heart means to lead, teach, and guide others especially young people with the care, strength, and love of a good father. It's more than just improving skills or winning; it's about forming character, building trust, and helping students become who they were created to be. Here's what it looks like in practice.
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Leading with Love and Strength. A father’s heart is both tender and tough. As coaches we must know when to correct and when to comfort. “Always connect before you correct” is a motto we have at Team Quest. That mean build a trusting relationship with your students first, then you have the trust when you need to correct.
A coach with a father’s heart pushes athletes to be their best, but never in a way that crushes their spirit. Instead, coaches inspire from a place of deep love and commitment. At The Father’s Heart we have a slogan we use ‘we are here to build you up not beat you up” As coaches we are here to encourage our athletes to be the best they can be.
There is a bigger picture a father doesn’t just see who a kid is now he sees who they could be. He calls out identity, purpose, and potential. A coach with a father’s heart isn't just training fighters or athletes, but shaping men of integrity, servant leaders, and warriors with honor.
“My son do not despise the Lord’s discipline, because the Lord disciplines the one, he loves” (Hebrews 12:5–6)
Consistency and being present are critical for kids. Like a father who shows up even when it’s hard, a coach with a father’s heart is dependable, present, and loyal. They become a steady presence in lives that might otherwise be chaotic.
A good father offers correction, but also grace. He sees mistakes as opportunities to teach not to shame. Coaches with a father’s heart don’t give up on kids who mess up, they walk with them through it, because they care about the whole person, not just their performance. We are always learning and growing - it’s a part of the process.
Coaching with a father’s heart means you live the message. Just like a father is a role model, a coach should show what hard work, humility, courage, and faith look like in real life. As coaches we are examples for kids to follow on and off the mats. Coaching with a father’s heart is to be a guide, protector, mentor, and encourager. It’s a powerful calling, one that shapes live far beyond the gym, or mats.
As coaches one of the most powerful tools we can give our athletes isn’t a technique or tactic it’s a mindset. A growth mindset believes that effort, learning, and perseverance lead to improvement. It’s the opposite of a fixed mindset, which assumes talent is static and success is limited to the “naturally gifted.”
As Romans 12:21 reminds us, true transformation begins with the renewing of our minds. That applies on the mat just as much as in our walk with Christ. When we help athletes see failure as feedback and hard work as worship we align them with the kind of grit God honors.
Let’s be intentional in the way we speak, don’t focus too heavily on talent. Encourage progress, not perfection. Praise effort and positive attitude more than outcomes.
Challenge athletes to take ownership of their growth, physically, mentally and spiritually. Proverbs 13:4 says, “The soul of the sluggard craves and gets nothing, but the soul of the diligent is richly supplied.” That’s a growth mindset. As coaches it’s our job to model and reinforce that to show our athletes the way.
In every drill, every loss, every tough moment God is shaping something deeper in our athletes. Let’s coach with that in mind, building champions not just for sport, but for life.
Keep leading, keep planting seeds, and keep believing growth is possible, because God’s not finished with any of us yet.
You can also read this post and more on my Substack. Please consider donating to our nonprofit, The Father’s Heart, to help bring inspiring and uplifting coaching to children in need of positive athletic training.
Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.